(no subject)

[alwaysbeenasmiler]

I always use my Ukitake icon when I'm feeling under the weather-- probably because I fondly refer to him as "Captain Consumption".

I've been a complete and utter flake, I've not responded to a lot of messages-- both on facebook and here because in all honestly, being sick and then the onset of anxiety/depression combo where I just don't want to do anything and I'm critically worried about fucking everything up at work. Of course I shouldn't worry about that because there are legions of people who critically fuck up every single day but none of them are as hard on themselves as I am.. I who realize I shouldn't be a complete and utter failure.

This weekend will likely a 'watching Trashy Versailles on Netflix and Playing Endless Rounds of FFXIV' (if you are on the Aether data center, I will probably be online-- and may put up a party so that anyone can find me lol) I just hate that I woke up with my throat feeling like trash, and now all I want is a grilled cheese. JUST ONE GRILLED CHEESE. That and tomato soup may not make me well but it'd make me happy--

'Paris' is escaping Order Control, she got offered a job and honestly-- good for her, it means none of us are going to have to listen to her complain. Though it means we are going to have ANOTHER untrained Order Control personnel and it's going to probbaly largely fall on me to train her. (another tick in the anxiety cog) however I've already stated that if they try to pawn off cage and vault onto me, I. AM. GIVING. TWO. WEEKS. NOTICE.

No ifs, ands or buts about it.

That will kill me if I have to adopt that responsibility and I need to do what is right for myself. And once I'm emmeshed in that shit, I don't think there's any coming back from that. It's like, by that time I will make sure I'm fired so totally and completely that they will never want me to come back-- ever.

So yes, there's that.

Once again my apologies... hopefully i'll be better in a week.

Comments

[dorchadas]

You know, I haven't had a grilled cheese and tomato soup in a long time. That sounds really good...

I hope your throat scratchiness passes without incident!

[breyzyyin]

Oh, grilled cheese and tomato soup is quite the comfort food! *hugs*

I hope that your throat will start to feel better soon, and I can relate a little bit to your current onset of anxiety/depression. I hope that will abate very, very soon for you as well...and always remember to do what is best for yourself first and foremost. *hugs tightly and waves support banner* ♥

[ai]

I hope you feel better soon! :)

[bardsley]

I am sorry that you are dealing with work stress and the anxiety/depression combo. I can very much relate. It sucks.

But you, however, are genuinely awesome. I love your taste in comfort food and in televised (or streamed) trash.

[alwaysbeenasmiler]

Awww thank you, you are way too sweet! And streamed trash is best trash and I am a fan of over sexualized historical dramas!

[bardsley]

I could really use more over-sexualized period dramas in my life. I think Versailles and Outlander are the only two I can think of.

[alwaysbeenasmiler]

Its funny and I love my husband to death-- I wouldn't trade him in for anything-- BUT..

When I think of the perfect man, it's like Alexander Vhalos was plucked right out of my brain detail by detail. I absolutely LOVE him as Louis' brother.

[alwaysbeenasmiler]

Also, Harlots on Hulu is really good.

[bardsley]

Alexander Vhalos is 90% of the reason that I watch the show. The other 10% is a combination of hair-porn, scenery, and wondering how they will f*ck up history, and story-writing next. Also, I love the German princess.
I'm looking forward to season three.

I watched the first season of Harlots. It has a very different feel to me than the other two shows because it is such a women-driven cast. I like it. I just don't associate with the other shows... Huh.

[alwaysbeenasmiler]

History was one of my favorite subjects in high school and college and the best thing that ever happened was historical dramas-- even if they aren't precisely historically accurate, I mean I fed myself on Phillipa Gregory books in high school and when The Other Boelyn Girl came out, you would of thought I had won the lottery or something.

The german princess is awesome, and I absolutely loved his reaction to her, like "What even is this?" but I also like how he came to care for her in his own way-- I mean it wasn't mad passionate love, but it was definitely somewhat affectionate in nature.

Harlots is great, but its also different because it isn't playing with history so much as expaning on a very historical time period. It also portrays how prostitution is a double edged sword-- it could put vast ammouts of power in a woman's hands OR it could bind and chain her, it was just a matter of the situations involve.

Oh gods, I could talk about history forever.

[bardsley]

"Oh gods, I could talk about history forever."

Please do. That seems like a lovely way to pass the time. :)

I have to confess, I am not a huge fan of Philipa Gregory, but that may because I came to her much later than you did. I read The Constant Princess, the one and only book of hers that I have read, in my 30s. I also didn't much like The Other Boleyn Girl, partly because Anne Boleyn is one of my historical crushes. I did, however, like The White Queen TV series, except for the rape-threat bits.

And, how did I forget about The Tudors! Then it comes to historical smut, that might have been my introduction.

Phillippe's reaction was great. They generally are the best part of the show. I also loved that the princess thought nothing of mentioning flinging piss from the carriage at their first meeting. That is a level giving no f*cks that I aspire to.

In the case of Harlots, I think you are right. But, I think that the best it could do is give women power while it binds her. Power is never hers in her own right. Power is only hers as long as she remains desirable to a man in power.