: Change is a'comming. :
9/9/18 08:46![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
alwaysbeenasmilerSo last week I had a pretty major breakdown at work. It involved me sitting there making bills, a seemingly harmless activity.. but all around me chaos was brewing and I just thought to myself "Death is preferrable to this". That thought alone caused me to step back and re-evaluate my life and what I was choosing to let stay in it i.e such a toxic environment as work. The more I was choosing to stay, the more I was giving them permission to work me 14 hours a day, five days a week.
I know what I am worth. I know I am a great worker, I excel at pretty much everything I set out to do and I've never had a problem with completing a task that was given. Yes, I've made some mistakes in my job and all jobs that I've done, but seriously we are all human, we learn from mistakes. I was starting to feel like an epic failure because they were giving me unrealistic odds to work with. If you only get ten hours of rest between shifts, you are GOING to fail-- from critical exhaustion and all of the side pals of critical exhaustions. Also I want to start a family, and that will not be possible with these hours.
My mother died a few weeks after I was born, from pregnancy complications and I am fearful that getting pregnant while in that work enviroment would be very harmful.
So I applied to Spectrum on wednesday-- by friday I had gone through the computer assessment, third interview AND I was offered the job as a Customer Relations Technical Support Coordinator on the Business side.
I will put in my two weeks-- don't think that they deserve it, but to not do it is not who I am. I have to act with integrity at all times, even if it's my own personal integrity.
I know what I am worth. I know I am a great worker, I excel at pretty much everything I set out to do and I've never had a problem with completing a task that was given. Yes, I've made some mistakes in my job and all jobs that I've done, but seriously we are all human, we learn from mistakes. I was starting to feel like an epic failure because they were giving me unrealistic odds to work with. If you only get ten hours of rest between shifts, you are GOING to fail-- from critical exhaustion and all of the side pals of critical exhaustions. Also I want to start a family, and that will not be possible with these hours.
My mother died a few weeks after I was born, from pregnancy complications and I am fearful that getting pregnant while in that work enviroment would be very harmful.
So I applied to Spectrum on wednesday-- by friday I had gone through the computer assessment, third interview AND I was offered the job as a Customer Relations Technical Support Coordinator on the Business side.
I will put in my two weeks-- don't think that they deserve it, but to not do it is not who I am. I have to act with integrity at all times, even if it's my own personal integrity.
(no subject)
9/9/18 14:38 (UTC)(no subject)
9/9/18 20:41 (UTC)(no subject)
10/9/18 02:50 (UTC)(no subject)
10/9/18 07:46 (UTC)(no subject)
10/9/18 08:21 (UTC)Don't feel bad about leaving a toxic work environment: they clearly don't care for you, so why should you care for them? I'm glad you're doing what's best for you because in the end you have to look out for yourself because they aren't going to.
I'm sorry to hear that about your mother. Thank you for sharing it, as it does give more depth to your reason as to why you're looking for a less stressful work environment.
(no subject)
12/9/18 01:07 (UTC)It was triggering my anxiety in all the worst possible ways.
(no subject)
12/9/18 01:10 (UTC)I agree completely about the leaving the toxic enviroment, I know they don't care about me-- and while I would hope that they did, it really is too much to hope and I'm not holding any hope that they care. If they cared, they'd try to ease the workload of EVERYONE, really all that they care about is trying to fill my spot now that I'm leaving.
There are so many reasons for leaving but I do want a family, and I just fear complications the moment I do become pregant. Like, will the stress be harmful to me? It's weighty things to consider.
(no subject)
12/9/18 07:10 (UTC)Employers these days rarely care about the people they work with. Sure, maybe your supervisor feels sympathy for you but their hands are tied behind their backs too due to their managers. It's a shitty system, but it's one that's prevalent in a number of places.
Good on you for seeking better opportunities. Here's to greener pastures.
(no subject)
12/9/18 18:12 (UTC)I think it's reasonable to be as loyal to the job as the job is loyal to you, which nowadays is almost always "not." And especially in this case. If they were crushing you under 70-hour weeks, getting out of there is the best possible decision.
I hope your new job goes much better!
The icon is for THEM, not you! :D
15/9/18 01:42 (UTC)Hope your new job makes you happier than your last job did! *hugs*